You vs. You

A Very Squinty Me and Elisabeth

So I was talking with Elisabeth Akinwale the other day (she casually drops into the conversation as if hanging out and chatting with a top 10 CrossFit Games competitor and all around badass weightlifter is an everyday occurrence in her life). Last weekend I was fortunate to have the opportunity to travel to Fort Mill, SC to participate in the MuscleDriver USA Open team tryouts - an Olympic Weightlifting team that Elisabeth is a member of, in addition to being a CrossFit Games competitor. I had no delusion that I would be considered for the team, I've only been lifting competitively for 5 months, but the opportunity to compete with someone like Elisabeth in front of people like Glenn Pendlay and Don McCauley, and get coached by an athlete like Travis Mash, was something I had to take advantage of and do so to the best of my ability.  Other than the fact that she's totally cool and easy to talk to, I took away some key things from the hour or so that we spent talking about everything from CrossFit scandals to kids and what we studied in college.

1. CrossFit (of which weightlifting is one component) is the sport of ordinary people doing extraordinary things. Elisabeth finished 7th in the games last year out of thousands of people worldwide. She's a pretty big deal and can do amazing things, but at the end of the day she's just a normal girl with a little boy at home. One of the cooler things about CrossFit is how accessible the elite level athletes are to the everyday lower level athletes like myself. That someone who's only been training for a year can feel a camaraderie with an athlete of the highest caliber in the sport and have the instant connection of knowing that we've had similar experiences. That I was even listed on the same competition roster as her was pretty cool to me.  I can't imagine that as a high school football player, for example, I would ever get the chance to play a game against an NFL team and then just hang out with the star quarterback afterward. There's a line between the elite and the beginner in most sports that just isn't as dark and foreboding in CrossFit as it is in other sports, at least it isn't for me.

2. In the same vein of elite level athletes being real people, it's easy to forget when we put these athletes up on their pedestals that they are just as vulnerable as the rest of us. They are hard on themselves about their performances and feel pressure to perform, much more in most cases. Elisabeth didn't have the pressure of trying to make the team or impress the coaches, she was already on the team, but even as basically an exhibition performance she had the pressure to perform well. Her name alone drew crowds of people to watch her pick up heavy things and put them down - me included. Knowing the total that she submitted, people expected her to put on a good show, and though I'd only just met her that morning, I could tell that she didn't want to let these people down.

If you think about the competition as a You vs. Everyone Else situation, Elisabeth did really well. She came in 3rd out of 10 competitors. In Olympic weightlifting you get three chances to lift the heaviest weight you can on two lifts, the snatch and the clean & jerk. You only have to hit one of each to get a total score - your best snatch + your best clean & jerk. Elisabeth did just that, hitting only one of her snatch attempts and one of  her clean & jerks. Her total was still 86 points higher than mine. In terms of Elisabeth vs. Elisabeth though,  this wasn't her best performance and she clearly wasn't happy with it.

By the same comparison, my meet in terms of Me vs. Everyone Else was not so stellar. I really couldn't have asked for a better meet though. For the first time in 3 official competitions I hit all 6 of my lifts (and was the only female to do so), I got competitions PRs on both my snatch and clean & jerk, and I totaled 101 - which was 4 points higher than my total at the RVA Open, 10 points higher than Baltimore, and my first time to total over 100. It was the best I've ever done in competition and given the fact that I haven't been 100% healthy in the last few weeks, I feel it was the best I could do on that day. Going into the competition I had the lowest submitted total, was by far the heaviest lifter, and I ended up in 9th place out of 10, only ahead of someone who failed to total. I was also probably one of the least experienced lifters. If I only looked at my performance in comparison with others, my absolute best wasn't good enough to win and I was the one that should have been embarrassed and upset. (Not to say that anyone should have been upset or embarrassed, just that coming in 9th might be a better reason than coming in 3rd.)

My Best Snatch - 45kg

My Best Clean & Jerk - 56kg

I choose to focus on Me vs. Me instead because I feel it's the best true measure of my personal success. Maybe someday down the road I'll be in competitions to win them and will have to compare myself to the other lifters, but right now competing is just about beating myself at the last meet, and I wiped the floor with Ginny from the RVA Open. Getting to talk with Elisabeth really put this into perspective for me. It's easy to pick the outlook that gives you the best result, to spin things in such as way that puts you in the best light, but you won't always see things the same way if you're not looking from the same angle each time. You can win competitions and not give your best performance, or  you can do your best and still lose. Either way, if you always compare current you to previous you, the only factor you can control, I think that's the best path to true growth and keeping yourself grounded.

This experience showed me that not being satisfied with anything but your best is what drives people to strive for greatness. To feel accomplished and deserving of the accolades when you reach greatness - knowing that you worked hard and did the best you could do, regardless of the outcome.